Carpenter Definition T-Shirt | Funny Woodworker Tee
$20.95 - $27.95
A dictionary entry in white type: “CARPENTER [kahr-puhn-ter] noun. A person who measures twice, cuts once, and still gets asked for ‘just one quick shelf.’” The see-also line finishes the job: sawdust in every pocket, a pencil behind the ear, opinions about every door you own.
Anyone who works with wood knows the shelf is never just one shelf, and it is never quick. This is for the carpenter who gets the request at family dinner, notices the bathroom door that sticks, and has sawdust in places no vacuum reaches. The people who live with them will recognize every line.
Who it's for
- Finish carpenters, framers and cabinet makers who hear “quick project” and sigh
- Weekend woodworkers with a garage shop and a pencil behind the ear
- Birthday or Father's Day gift from family living among the shelves they built
- Apprentices finishing their first year, and the old hands who trained them
Fabric & fit
- Gildan 5000 Heavy Cotton tee, 5.3 oz/yd² (180 g/m²) midweight fabric
- Solid colors are 100% cotton; Dark Heather and Heather Navy are 50% cotton, 50% polyester
- Classic unisex fit, no side seams, taped shoulders, ribbed crew neck, tear-away label
- Printed on the front, direct-to-garment (DTG), made to order
- The blank is OEKO-TEX STANDARD 100 certified
- Unisex sizes S–5XL; for a looser fit, size up
Size chart
| Size | Chest width | Length |
|---|---|---|
| S | 18 in / 46 cm | 28 in / 71 cm |
| M | 20 in / 51 cm | 29 in / 74 cm |
| L | 22 in / 56 cm | 30 in / 76 cm |
| XL | 24 in / 61 cm | 31 in / 79 cm |
| 2XL | 26 in / 66 cm | 32 in / 81 cm |
| 3XL | 28 in / 71 cm | 33 in / 84 cm |
| 4XL | 30 in / 76 cm | 34 in / 86 cm |
| 5XL | 32 in / 81 cm | 35 in / 89 cm |
Measured flat across the chest, 1 in below the armholes, and from the high point of the shoulder to the hem. Tolerance about 1.5 in.
Care
Machine wash cold, inside out (max 30°C / 86°F) · non-chlorine bleach only · tumble dry low or hang dry · iron on low heat, not over the print · do not dry clean.
Printed to order and shipped from the USA. See more funny t-shirts.
Product safety (EU): EU Representative: HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3 Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, Cyprus. Product: Gildan 5000. For adults. 2 year warranty in the EU. Made in Nicaragua.
GPSR information
HONSON VENTURES LIMITED, gpsr@honsonventures.com, 3, Gnaftis House flat 102, Limassol, Mesa Geitonia, 4003, CY
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PHONE CASES:
Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and UK as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Care instructions: Clean with damp cotton or microfiber cloth. Add a drop of dish soap to the cloth if needed.
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COFFEE MUGS:
Product information: Generic brand, 2 year warranty in EU and UK as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Care instructions: Clean in dishwasher (put the product on top rack), or wash by hand with warm water and dish soap
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HOODIES:
Product information: Gildan, 18500, 2 year warranty in EU and UK as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Warnings, Hazzard: For adults, EU warranty - 2 years, Made in Bangladesh
Care instructions: Machine wash: cold (max 30C or 90F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: medium, Iron, steam or dry: low heat, Do not dryclean
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T-SHIRTS:
Product information: Gildan, 5000, 2 year warranty in EU and UK as per Directive 1999/44/EC
Warnings, Hazzard: For adults, EU warranty - 2 years, Made in Nicaragua
Care instructions: Machine wash: warm (max 40C or 105F), Non-chlorine: bleach as needed, Tumble dry: medium, Do not iron, Do not dryclean
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FAQ
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All products are made to order and dispatched within 1-2 business days. Once shipped, transit times are: US 3-5 days, UK 3-6 days, EU 4-8 days, Australia 3-7 days. Everything ships from the USA.
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Yes - we ship to the US, UK, Europe, Australia, Canada, and most countries worldwide. Shipping costs are calculated at checkout based on your location. Every order comes with tracking so you can follow it from our door to yours.
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Orders go into production quickly, so email us at 365carmods@gmail.com as soon as possible if you need to make a change. Once production has started we can't modify it. That said, if your order arrives damaged or with a print defect, we'll replace it at no cost - just contact us within 14 days of delivery.
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T-shirts and hoodies use DTG (direct-to-garment) printing, which bonds the ink into the fabric fibers rather than sitting on top. Wash inside-out in cold water and it stays sharp for years. Mugs use dye-sublimation - the design is heat-bonded into the ceramic surface, so it won't scratch, peel, or fade with regular use.
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Each product page has a size guide table with chest width and length measurements in inches for every size from S to 3XL. Most customers order their normal size. If you're between sizes or prefer a looser fit, go one size up.
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Yes. Our ceramic mugs are both dishwasher safe and microwave safe. The dye-sublimation print is heat-bonded into the surface, not just printed on top, so it won't scratch, fade, or peel with regular use.